Text of the Poem
Children understand him,
and only this has kept intact
his pride and self-respect.
Otherwise he is a dry stream-bed
living on memories
and an inadequate pension,
and the hospitality
now given, now revoked,
of his sons and daughters.
An old man, who must be humoured,
and sent to his room
when there are guests about,
but always to be relied on
to keep the children upstairs and
out of mischief.
Yes,
they understand him.
From man-roar, and friendly
punches to the chest,
and damp kisses on scrubbed
cheeks
they sail to the harbour of his knees.
Main idea
The poem, “Children Understand
Him”, written by Taufiq Rafat revolves around an old man’s life who is
neglected by his sons and daughters but at the same time loved by his
grandchildren which gives him a sense of contentment. The affection of
grandchildren proves as soul satisfaction for a person living a fruitless and
unproductive life with a scarcity of funds.
Paraphrasing
This is a simple poem outside but with a deep meaning inside. The poet talks about a person who turns old and is treated as worthless and valueless. He gets hurt the way he is being treated by his kids but the ‘children’ in fact the grandchildren, love his play with him, hug him, come to his lap, and even kiss him on his, ‘scrapped’ cheeks. All hugging, love, and kissing keep the old person alive and give a lift to his pride and ego.
The second stanza talks about the
inert situation of an old person physically as well as financially. The poet is
of the view that when a father or a mother gets old, he or she becomes a burden
for their kids. They are not warmly welcomed because they have nothing to share
except some past recollections. Parents’ memories cause boredom for kids so
they are reluctant to host their old ones.
In the last stanza, the poet further points out the loathsome attitude of people towards old family members. He says that the old person is always avoided if there are some guests around. The old father is sent upstairs for two reasons, first, he may not come in contact with visitors, and secondly, his only usefulness is that he can keep the kids away from the guests just to avoid making a mess.
But he is happy with his grandchildren as they become the reason for his happiness, his pride, his self-esteem, and his self-respect. They hug him, play with him, swing in his arms and lap, punch him on his chest, and above all kiss him on his rough skin. It all pleases him and gives him reason to forget what his children are doing to him.
Tone
The tone of the poem is predominantly satirical towards society’s devastating and dissolute attitude towards their old family members. Overall, the poet paints a gloomy picture with few redeeming facts when we see the love of children towards their grandparents.
Structure
The poem consists of three
stanzas written in free verse. The use of free verse is because the poem is
about old age which is free age from work as well as from responsibilities. But
this age has special needs so they should be given special respect while being
idle.
Diction
The diction used by the poet is
very simple taken from day-to-day life. The words explicitly explain and
portray the ironic picture of society. The phrases, ‘dry stream-bed’ and
‘scrubbed cheeks’ and the word, ‘harbour’, truly paint the main points of the
poem.
Imagery
The poet very beautifully uses the metaphor of, ‘dry stream-bed’ for the old man who got old and of no use for his family members to whom he once was the source of bread and butter. Just like a stream full of water and beaming with life. This metaphor also depicts society’s dryness and withered attitude of young sons and daughters towards their old parents.
Then the use of, ‘scrubbed cheeks’ stands for facts of the hard times a person faces in his lifetime, the hard work he goes through while earning for his family and bringing comfort to them. The use of word, ‘harbour’ stands for a voyage, when a ship or a boat after completing and crossing its strenuous and arduous expedition, ultimately anchored at the shore peacefully.
Themes
The poet touches on many other ideas besides the one main theme i.e. how a retired person while living a dormant life is being shown or facing the aloof attitudes of his children.
He shows how a retired man is redeeming his ego pride and pretensions while becoming a child with his grandchildren.
How healthy, strong, and robust lives they have spent but now they are dealt as a dry stream bed, disregarding their struggle, their endeavors, and the turmoil they went through and made their cheeks scrubbed. Every wrinkle of their face stands for the fight he combated.
Then the scarcity of funds is also an issue with old age usually ignored by young children.
Moreover, how the presence of children works as an assurance and gives a sort of confidence to the old man to live on.
Critical analysis
The poem starts from the middle of the discourse and flashbacks to the main theme of the poem. It is a mirror of society’s indifference towards their old parents. This satirical work by Rafat should be taken seriously as it is more important to keep a person’s especially the old one’s pride and ego intact.
It is a very basic human need. It works as oxygen especially when a person turns idle to do things which he can do very easily when he is young. The use of the dry bed of the stream in fact stands for the spiritual drought prevailing in the society. Water is the symbol of life and fertility. The old man is a ‘dry stream-bed’ for his real children. They no longer feel any need which is why they show dry behavior towards their father who once runs like water in their lives. He is weak physically as well as financially. If he feels relish in recalling the bygone times, his children feel bored.
People are not showing compassion the way they should do towards old people of the society. But the start and the end of the poem have a brighter and breezing sense when we see the grandchildren loving and kissing their grandfather.
It shows an appositive element and a ray of hope that society is not so dry and dead. Kids playing with old family members is an optimistic and pragmatic approach. It shows at least our future is secure and they are not stranded towards their old members.
This article is written by Farrukh Anjum, one of the contributors at the School of Literature.
